16 Aug 2014

TO LIVE + DIE IN LA {traveling gypsies}

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29 Jul 2014

ENLIGHTENMENT THROUGH MOTHERHOOD {musings}

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 presetOur children pay a heavy price when we lack consciousness… unresolved needs, unmet expectations, and frustrated dreams. Despite our best intentions, we enslave them to the emotional inheritance we received from our parents, bringing them to the debilitating legacy of ancestors past. The nature of unconsciousness is such that, until it’s metabolized, it will seep through generation after generation. Only through awareness can the cycle of pain that swirls families end. [The Conscious Parent by Dr. Shefali Tsabary]

My little Buddhas teach me more than any two people ever have. About love. About my fears. About my battle with my own ego. About my struggle with attachment + control. I’ve never loved anything like I love my children. My love for them is way out of my control + scary, but it’s also the sweetest thing that’s ever run through my bones. [I know this is the same for most parents out there, so I apologize for the redundancy.]
Prior to children, I had a pretty solid Buddhist practice. And with a few years of practice, I had definitely started a beautiful journey of getting to know myself on a deeper level + I had also gotten into a groove with the practice of detachment from my ego… Then I had Lennon… And my crazyass love for him [+ now Leo Wolfe also] has my struggle with attachment on high. I’ve never loved anything more than I love these dudes. I’m now attached to living [literally not dying] more than I’ve ever been because I want to be here to teach them + love them. I also have these new attachments to this [ever-evolving] image of a life I want for my boys. With that, comes L O A D S of expectations on myself as a mother [+ a provider] + on them as individuals. If I don’t check my ass, my attachments + expectations put a lot of pressure + anxiety on us as a unit. My ego steps in + tries to micromanage every situation in hopes to keep our ship on track with my vision for us. As my ego realizes it has very little control, I can get anxious + even angry. I get irritated with this, because I feel like I’ve backtracked in some areas since becoming a mom.
I’ve definitely noticed that when I detach from my expectations of myself + my expectations of my babes, I feel this ebb and flow enter back into our world. But that peace only comes to me when I have time to process things. I have to be able to step back + see how my ego has started taking over in situations + wreaking havoc on my world… I have less time to meditate since becoming a mom, less time to get right.
I’ve realized some profound things about myself this last week, and I am anxious to dig deeper. I love nothing more than those sweet moments of transcendence. To be honest, it’s been a long time since I’ve had one. While I’ve been very happy + excited about life, I’ve kinda been in survival mode since Leo’s been born. I don’t get much sleep + work has been busier than ever + two kids hasn’t left much time for [personal] growth. But I feel like I’m gaining more perspective + awareness lately. [I freakin' love that about traveling!! It almost always leads to these major shifts in my consciousness.]

11 Jul 2014

ZYTO SCAN {hippie shit}

ZYTO SCAN | I got the boys + myself zyto scanned the other day. It was quick + easy- we place our hand on the device below + it scanned our skin, then suggested essential oils + supplements that would benefit us. We sat Wolfey on the scanner  to do his scan. [Hehe. I can't help it, I'll ride that crazy, hippie train til I die. It works for me + my family].ZYTO SCANWe each got back a PDF with suggested oils + supplements + a detailed description. [see below] All of the suggestions made sense + I’m excited to see how our prescription of oils will help us. [Of course, I scanned for Rose, one of the most expensive oils. bleh!] While Papa probably thinks I’m a crazy horse, he lets me put them all over him too + the diffuser is rarely off. I hope to bring him along next time.
ZYTO SCAN lennon july 2014ZYTO SCAN leo july 2014 ZYTO SCAN greer july 2014 ZYTO SCAN greer descriptions

10 Jul 2014

MUSIC {and my dad}

GREER INEZ laguna beach victoria beach 2DADDY’S GIRL | My dad + I are both water signs + connect on so many levels because we are a lot alike; we are both very sensitive/emotional + can get pretty cranky if we can’t exercise daily + kinda sorta academic elitists + introspective + relentlessly curious about other cultures + like a lot of time by ourselves + yellow-dog Democrats + skeptical of any zealot + mad love for music [we both tend to obsess over albums + play them over + over + over] + have a deep, long, hard passion for photography [HE is the reason I can call myself a professional photographer, which is one of my greatest joys I get to experience on the daily]. I am so thankful I have had my dad as long as I have, it’s especially amazing to see him be a grandpa. New realm of love in our relationship.

GREER INEZ laguna beach victoria beach Music is probably what makes me feel most connected to my dad. There are certain songs + albums that remind me of each of my parents. A few seconds into them, and I feel like a five-year-old stomping through our home in Baton Rouge. I get those childhood feelings of being dominated by my imagination + no care or responsibility in the world + safety beyond measure with both of my parents close by. Some of those songs + albums are:
Tracy Chapman: especially Fast Car
The Mission Soundtrack
James Taylor: especially Up On The Roof
Landslide by Stevie
Madonna’s True Blue album
The Hours Soundtrack
Thin Red Line: especially track
Alice in Chains’ Three Legged Dog album
This morning a few songs came on that reminded me of my dad + I got slammed with the ever-haunting overwhelming fear I have of losing him + having to continue on in a world without my dad. Hussy says it’s like our psyche starts preparing us for those moments, so we can somehow handle it + survive when it happens. I get petrified at even the thought of existence without either of my parents, so I don’t know how I will do anything but have a major wipe out.
*The photos of me above were taken by my dad. LAGUNA BEACH // victoria beach // JANUARY 2007 // My Aunt Nez had just been diagnosed with glioblastoma [a very aggressive brain cancer]. I met my dad in Laguna Beach to meet her neurosurgeon + care for her while she went through brain surgery. That time in my life still feels surreal + slightly fictional.

9 Jul 2014

CELEBRATING OUR INDEPENDENCE {with our tribe}

While I have many mixed emotions about ‘Merica, I am very grateful for the independence in which my family + I get to exist. We celebrated all weekend with our tribe.
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23 Jun 2014

HEAD ABOVE WATER {because of these five privileges}

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 presetProcessed with VSCOcam with f2 presetIt’s been quite the ride the last 10 months of our lives [with adding Leo to our family + my business growing much more than I expected]. I’ve definitely had some panic in my bones as I’ve felt overwhelmed + behind, but it’s also been a new//higher level of happiness. My mantra has been just keep moving forward + stay fluid no matter what comes your way. But thinking of some adjustments to ease the stress was my main intention for my time spent in Joshua Tree + Laguna Beach a few weeks ago. Something in me didn’t want to hire help, I felt this need to do it all myself. But once I cleared my head, I felt very differently about hiring help. In fact, I looked forward to giving my money to the right people in order to make my life easier. Back to that energy as money thing, it is empowering to choose where my hard-earned money goes + I love supporting these people.
Below are the five things [privileges] I’ve recently added to my life. My head is well above water again + I have more quality time with my family.
ASSISTANT | I hired a wonderful assistant + love every part of this addition to my business. She is brilliant + makes my life so much easier. I gladly pay her to help me in exchange for more time with my family!
NANNY | I can’t believe I made it as long as I did, without a nanny for Wolfey. I am crazy about my nanny + beyond appreciative to her for all the love she pours into my family!
LIST-MAKING | I used to be neurotic about keeping lists. My agenda in high school + college was filled with details to the minute. For some reason, I abandoned this practice years ago because I felt like I was being a control freak. I’ve tried to start it up again, but haven’t been good about it until recently. It’s been awesome!! Any time I have an “I need to…” or an “Oh email/call…”, I grab my little field notebook, and jot it down. I had been trying to remind myself over + over in my head. Naturally it was impeding my quality time with my family because I was stressing I’d forget my to-do list. [Kathleen got me this cute notebook from Shop Good.]
GROCERY SHOPPING SERVICE | Well, this is the best thing since sliced bread! Whole Foods has a grocery shopping service. I email my list + the WF crew grabs my groceries + runs them out to my car curbside when I can come by. eeeeep! I honestly feel like I’ve won the lottery!
YMCA [+ BARRE 3] | Exercise if a natural remedy for stress, those endorphins are free happy drugs at your fingertips at all times. I’ve been a gym-rat since I was 14-years-old. While I feel like yoga can sustain me in perfect physical + emotional health, I still love free weights + hitting that cardio, especially a cycling class. Hussy + I have gone to the gym together since we were dating. It feels good to be back at it as a family of four! // Barre 3 is also a favorite work-out lately because of the convenience of their childcare, it so easy for me to fit it into my day.
*My next dream privilege would be having a maid.
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18 Jun 2014

CELEBRATING FATHER’S DAY {at Lake Tenkiller}

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 presetProcessed with VSCOcam with f2 presetProcessed with VSCOcam with f2 presetProcessed with VSCOcam with f2 presetOne of our favorite weekend getaways is to family-road-trip it to Lake Tenkiller. This year, we decided to celebrate Father’s Day with Hussy’s family there at their cabin. While it was total chaos with all of the kids [my own two + my two nieces], I did spend every spare moment I could thinking about the Fathers in my life + feeling very grateful for these men. I also had an overwhelming thankfulness that I still have my dad today, because my love for him has grown deeper + bigger since I’ve become a mom. Continue reading »

26 May 2014

JOSHUA TREE DESERT {+ a heavy dose of the Pacific Ocean}

Life has felt so overwhelmingly fast, lately. While I’ve been so happy, life has just gotten crazy busy since Leo has arrived. I feel like I’m simply responding to life. Not making heartfelt + thought-out choices. I’ve started to feel behind + feel like I’ve been missing out on things along the way. The lack of sleep has me feeling exhausted. And inevitably, I’ve become irritable. I’ve been aching for some way to slow down + process the last year + do some visioning for the future + maybe even catch up on some motherlovin’ rest… I felt like the Spirit Weavers Gathering was the perfect answer. I did a lot of camping in Oklahoma throughout my childhood + in New Mexico + Colorado throughout my twenties, I’m comfortable getting dirty + going without showers and I know how to protect myself in extreme temperatures during the day + night. The land/nature is sacred to me, being outside for me is spiritual, a feeling that some may get while they are at church. I don’t believe in a god, but the land + nature is sacred to me. It is where I feel the most alive + connected to that collective consciousness. Leo would come with me since he’s still on the boob, so I was stoked to make it a babymoon. I needed to have a pre-shoot consultation with one of my clients in LA + do some work on our Laguna house, so I decided to wrap it all into one big trip. My girlfriend, Claire, was heading out for the gathering too, so we planned on traveling together + getting some sister-bonding time along the way.Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset JOSHUA TREE spirit weavers gathering 2 Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset Continue reading »

12 May 2014

ALI FEATURE {Nena & Co giveaway}

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I’ve been obsessing over Nena + Co. bags for months now. I think of any excuse to have one of Ali’s gorgeous pieces on my body at all times. I am so excited to feature Ali, the genius owner behind Nena + Co, + also be giving away one of her beautiful camera straps this week. I will announce the winner on Saturday, MAY 17.
editsinstructions to enter the giveaway: 1. LIKE Nena + Co on Facebook or LIKE Nena + Co on Instagram. and 2. comment on this post, telling me if you prefer to interact/keep up with me on Mama Hussy or Instagram. 3. LIKE my photography Facebook page.
ENJOY ALI’S INTERVIEW BELOW:
G. How old were you when you dreamed up this business?
A. Like a lot of people out there, I’ve always wanted to do my own thing but I wasn’t sure what I could do. I had grown up around Guatemalan textiles but when I was in my mid 20’s I started to see them and art work from Guatemala in a different way. I started to realize a lot of people would love them if they were exposed to them. At first I wanted to import antique furniture from Guatemala because they have such amazing finds there, church doors, benches, and dinning tables that are all hand carved and stunning. But the logistics of that were just too overwhelming so I put that on the back burner.  Artisan’s in Guatemala have been turning “huipils” and “Corte” (or traditional Maya clothing) into usable every day items like bags or table runners for a long time but they always looked too “hippy” for me. For example, they seemed amazing when you’re in a exotic setting in the market and so you buy it, but then you take it home and think “its not as cool as i remember it being.” The problem was that they didn’t have the right designs for Westerners to see the beauty in the materials being used and also be able to incorporate it into their everyday life without feeling like a sucker that came home from vacation with their hair braided in corn rows.NENA AND CO bags
G. How long did it take to make it happen?
A. The idea of making bags and other products from traditional Maya clothing probably was an idea I had 7 years in the making. It didn’t come into fruition until January of 2013 and I was up and running by June of 2013. Luckily my family is from Guatemala and my Mom was already working with women in Guatemala for her own business. And my Aunt has dedicated her entire life to working with under priviallged Maya’s in Guatemala so naturally I went to her since she was my inspiration to work with Maya people.  The combination of my Aunt and my Mom  made it a lot easier to set up a company with the infrastructure that I have.
G. What’s your favorite thing you’ve gotten to do for these ladies in Guatemala through your bags?
A. We work with non-profits a lot and of course that has been fantastic but giving women and men steady work is what I am most proud of because it’s something they can be proud of as well.NENA AND CONENA + CO
G. What’s your favorite bag?
A.My favorite bag always changes! Its usually whatever the newest design is. So right now its the Fringe Tote. But my new favorite product is the Kimono!
G. Where do you see this business in 3 years? Has your vision changed at all?
A. I am expanding to boots, accessories, Baby & Child and a small collection of Home Goods. The homes goods will start with pillows, throws and other small item but I would LOVE to be able to import furniture like I had originally hoped to do. My greater vision has stayed put and will continue on the same path of giving more work to more people that need it. And to pay fair wages since that is so important to me. The more I create the more possibilities I can see and so my design vision keeps expanding and evolving almost daily!NENA AND CO daybag
G. Even if you’re very passionate about the vision of your business, owning a business can be stressful. What are your go-to stress relievers?
A. Knowing that you can’t do everything on your own is an important thing to realize. I love what I’m doing but I had one too many nights that I would break down and cry because I couldn’t keep up with the everyday work and the “looking ahead” work such as product development, quality control, and marketing. One of the biggest stress relievers was hiring people to help me. Knowing when to ask for help is a big deal. I also stopped working out completely when I first started and working out it a BIG stress reliever for me. I make myself do some sort of work out at least 2-3 times a week whether I have time for it or not. I make time. I love Crossfit and I just started Barre classes!
G. Your parents work with/for you. What is your favorite + the hardest thing about working with family.
A. I’m super lucky to have a great relationship with my parents. If they weren’t working with me, I would be annoying them like crazy asking them for help and with a million questions. My parents have been entrepreneurs ever since I can remember and they both run and own their own business’s at the moment as well so there is nothing they haven’t gone through that I’m going through right now! So the best part is they are incredibly supportive and have been the behind the scene force that has kept me organized in a way that we can continue to grow. I’m not sure if there is down side at the moment but if I had to say something I think the hardest part is I feel really annoying sometimes when I have no idea how to do something and need a lot of their input. But I’m learning from them and they make me feel like everything is a learning process and its OK.
5 May 2014

AN APPROPRIATE REALIZATION {for mother’s day week}

Watching Lennon grow + learn + evolve has been all exciting. Every new thing he’s done has made my heart soar to the sky. But last night felt different when I noticed his growth. It made me so sad, and I feel a little sadness over me today.
GREER INEZ-2 I was laying in bed with Lennon, last night, and had one of the most heart-wrenching realizations. And although I’ve heard moms say this shit my whole life, it still hurts so deep to experience it myself. My baby is no longer a baby. 
Sitting there next to my big boi, last night, I felt his long + lean arms. Rubbing his tummy, my fingers rippled over his muscles, not a soft, toddler belly. And the snuggles were fleeting. My hands were pretty quickly pushed away.
GREER INEZ-5Our night-time discussion was very different from the last time. He was much more mature + inquisitive during story time. He told me, I don’t want to go to sleep because I don’t want to stop thinking about all the fun things James + I are going to do at summer camp. We had to talk about ways to calm + slow down the mind to reach a state of rest. I loved it, because I love learning more about him as a person, he is so smart + funny. But it was also so sad that my moody, snuggly toddler is gone.
He still requested my night-time song [thankfully]:
I love you Lennon. Yes, I do. I love you, Lennon. Through and through.
You’re my baby. My baby boy. My sweetest thang. And my pride and joy.
I love you Lennon. Yes, I do. I love you, Lennon. Through and through.
You’re my baby. My baby boy. My sweetest thang. And my pride and joy.
but I am sure that was one of the last times I get to sing that to him.]
He finally fell asleep, and I walked back to my bed + cried as I thought about what a big boy Lennon has become. The worst part about this realization, is I’ve missed so many of my opportunities to relish in those sweet snuggles + silly giggles this last year of Lennon’s toddler-ville. I’ve been seriously blacked out on sweet Baby Leo Wolfe for at least 8+ months [but I have to add in those last months of pregnancy, because I was down for the count, baking Leo real hard.].  I just feel so heart-broken. The dramatic person I am, I feel like my baby was snatched outta my hands without warning.
Here’s my honest confession that I feel weird [maybe a little guilty] for admitting, I wish I wouldn’t have given into the pressure to make my kids close in age + waited to have Leo. That way I would have gotten to better soak up my last months with Lennon as a toddler. But hindsight’s 20/20, eh?!
*These are the kinds of fun subjects discussed in our MODERN MAMA online forum. The next one starting at the end of MAY. email hello@greerinez.com to get registered.