21 Aug 2015

THE CHARIOT {strong will}

THE CHARIOT // is your confidence, your will + your inner warrior. at points in your life when you felt the bliss of achievement or triumph, you were riding on his back. build a relationship with this part of yourself. try to “see” the chariot inside you. the more focused your mind, the easier it will be to sense his presence + stay mounted on his back. with a fixed gaze + sure footing you’ll be headed towards all you dream of.
THIS GEM is what big boi pulled early this morning. on his first day of school. I’m slightly jealous + not surprised he pulled it. I’ll gladly read this to him as often as possible.

12 Jul 2015

THE MAGIC {dissipates anxiety}

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Live life as if everything is rigged in your favor. -Rumi
I find it hard to practice this without believing in the magic! But I stopped believing in the magic when I was around 22. It was a slow process, but I approached a time in my religious practice [which was Christianity at the time] where the jargon + beliefs no longer made sense to me. I even felt betrayed + lead astray by my leaders. Down a path that would never serve me, especially as a woman. The two things that bothered me the most were the lack of reverence for the Earth + the lack of equality. I was told that I was a pantheist.
It was during this time that I lost touch with the magic. Spirituality started to sound very silly to me. I just had no jargon for it + I eventually had no spiritual practice at all. My love for the Earth + my passion for equality found a platform in politics + academia. My practice of prayer found a platform in yoga. But I continued to see no god + hear no god, and eventually even became very uncomfortable with + leery of those that spoke of god.
In my venture to heal my adrenal fatigue, I have found my belief in the magic again. I feel like the magic has always been there, but I haven’t been acknowledging it. And the magic is what dissipates my anxiety almost completely. So, I am now very devoted to some practices that help me stay in the closest contact with the magic. I got a whole room to myself in our new home + it’s really kicked it up a notch! I have a place for my sitting practice + yoga practice with all of my sacred goodies surrounding me. I am enjoying it to the max. And encouraging all of my boys to enjoy the beautiful, sacred space too.

6 Jul 2015

REBELLION GENE {he got it from his mama}

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REBELLION GENE // he got it from his mama! I have it bad! When being told “no,” it jumbles up in my head + is translated into “Someone brave hasn’t attempted that yet. You should try it!” As hard as I fight it, I have a tendency to chase certain challenges. Typically driven by curiosity + a passion for experiencing life to the fullest. No doubt, I got this gene from my dad’s side. This dude has it bad too! Understanding this about myself + seeing it in him already, it definitely affects my parenting. Sometimes, I worry in a “bad” way. For example, I am very careful with what information to share with him because he will be like a moth to a flame; curiosity will magnetically draw him in. But my mom says it’s good that I understand him so well + that she would have given anything to understand me better [she’s cautious + is glad to follow the rules].

29 May 2015

ADRENAL FATIGUE {the dark night of my soul}

GREER INEZ-6663This winter, I deepened my relationship with my body + my spirit big time. It really didn’t feel like I had an option. Early fall, I knew some things had gotten out of control; anxiety + [even anger sometimes] + exhaustion + fogginess + dry skin + stubborn “baby weight” + quite a bit of fear… I went into the whole thing trying to be open to new perspectives. I take an ayurvedic approach in life + healing  [I will share some of my favorite references soon]. Because I believe food is our medicine, that’s where I started my healing journey. I don’t think it’s for everyone, but I feel best off of dairy + gluten. I began making concoctions [+ still do] each morning + noon + night along with altering my diet for the healing I needed. I also focused on raising my vibration in every way I could [through all kinds of hippie shit].
My reiki [lithotherapy] healers referred to my winter as the dark night of my soul. My naturopath reminds me that our body [+ therefore our spirit] goes through seven-year-cycles, so as I approach my 35th birthday, this deepening isn’t surprising. It’s been a long trek for me, obviously I had a lot of work to do. It felt like my body was guiding me toward the emotional + spiritual work I needed to do. I began receiving clarity in so many areas I so badly needed. And what was weird is I started opening up to spirituality [again]. I have been so closed off to spirituality the past decade + pretty uncomfortable + judgmental toward those that spoke of god. But the past 6+ months, I’ve kept telling myself to remain open to the new coincidences [alignment] I was noticing + it’s been such a mind-blowing, potent journey.
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A good friend suggested I get my hormones scanned, so I did. My scan came back pre-menopausal- while this was heartbreaking to realize my little body was truly struggling [not just my mind], I loved finally getting some answers to go with my assumptions. In my [ayurvedic] research, I moved toward hormonal imbalance + how to fix it. I soon realized all of the [bad] things that can occur within our bodies + minds when our hormones are imbalanced.
I continued my typical acupuncture + lithotherapy regularly + was experiencing healing + insight, but needed that next level of insight. I finally found an amazing naturopath [the doctor I have been dreaming about my whole life] + was
officially diagnosed with adrenal fatigue. Immediately, so much made sense to me as she explained more about adrenal fatigue! Because of the cultural norms [amount of stress] most women agree to, I think many struggle with adrenal fatigue + adrenal exhaustion without even knowing it. That is the reason I am sharing my story. I followed all of my naturopath’s suggestions + started taking her supplements. Being a holistic doctor, she also reminded me of how much my inner dialogue plays a role in my state of health. With my background/experience in yoga + ayurvedic medicine, it made sense to make a conscious effort to start tapping into my parasympathetic nervous system as often as possible. So I’ve continued consuming my healing concoctions + have committed to the following additions:
1794640_10155111715250557_9110978710089330829_n MORE SLEEP // This has been the hardest one for me, because Leo Wolfe still nurses like a newborn. It’s also been the biggest problem in all of this! We need sleep! Leo is getting a little better the older he gets + I go to bed by 9:00 pm every night, but I am looking forward to even more sleep.
COSMIC CONCOCTIONS // I make elixers + teas + concoctions all day long. These have been a major part of my healing journey + will forever remain a part of my daily routine. My concoctions are paired with a clean diet. The deeper I have delved into my healing journey, the more clarity [in my mind] I received. The cleaner our bodies are, the cleaner our brain is. I no longer feel the fogginess, even on the days I didn’t get much sleep.
LESS SCREEN-TIME // I scanned positive for heavy radiation at my naturopath. She hooked me up with some gia chips for my phone + computer + I have cut back on screen time. This is hard for me with my job, but I have noticed a difference in my fogginess. 
ESSENTIAL OILS // I made a roller of the adrenal support recipe from our Blissful Oils EBook+ put it on my throat 3 times a day.
NO COFFEE // I slept better immediately + experience waaaaay less anxiety + much more clarity.
GROUNDING PRACTICES // I take looooooooong walks daily. This is where I listen to my podcasts! Death + Sex + Money + Being Boss are my favorite podcasts. I take off my shoes outside to root down as often as possible. I take off my glasses + let the sunlight enter my eyes.
BATHS // have incredible healing power + I simply make time for them as often as possible.
YOGA NIDRA + MEDITATION // I have gone in + out of my consistent meditation practice the past two decades. But when I lost the time for it when I had babies, I realized I needed it more than ever. I make time for it every day! Guided meditations are easiest for me. If my mind is given the freedom to roam, I’m doomed! Solara’s guided meditations are my favorite + I love this Yoga Nidra app.
STORIES OF STRENGTH + RESILIENCE // through my job [+ my travels] + podcasts + documentaries + books. I was in a funk + needed to be reminded of my own resilience. Through other people’s stories, I have realized my own strength + resilience.
MOON MEDICINE // I started living my life according to the moon phases in January when I started working with Achintya + Ameya. Part of the beautiful alignment I’ve been experiencing was my inclination to sign up for my first Goddess Rising program, which was Sisters of the Moon. These women are two of my most influential teachers in this lifetime. Through my mentorship with these amazing ladies, I have learned to love myself + my body + my spirit in a way that has transformed my life. Patterns + fears that used to enslave me now feel so distant. [Achintya is @goddess_rising + Ameya is @woman.rising on IG]
It’s been the most romantic Spring of my life. As the Earth wakes from it’s winter slumber, I also feel an incredible resurrection occurring within my own body + spirit. My work + my relationships + my inner dialogue have never been better. Life is still chaotic as we try to sell our house + pack up + move back to our hometown, but my peace has remained greater than the chaos. I feel old lately, but it actually feels good. I feel strong + calm + clear-headed. I’m getting more used to it, but the alignment I experience on the daily is still so exciting! Gratitude is what fills me.


15 Apr 2015

BUILDING BRIDGES [out of love]

FullSizeRenderConformity is a survival mechanism. To gain acceptance [love] + success [means to survive], it often helps to go with the flow of the masses. I see this on a small scale with family + on a large scale with society. But conforming can be quite painful for some of us if it doesn’t feel natural to do/be what the masses are. It’s the fear of judgment that encourages most to continue conforming , even when it’s painful. I am learning that our judgment of others has very little to do with the person we are judging. Our discomfort is less with the person, but more with the mirror that is being shown to us, often a boundary that we need to hurdle//dissipate.
Growing up, I was a drifter. I couldn’t commit to one social group because not a single one felt right. I felt a connection with a few people here + there, but it’s been a very slow process to find my people + roadmap. And with that lengthy process, I’ve acquired some major wounds along the way. It’s when I’ve conformed + sacrificed a distance from my authentic self in hopes of receiving love. I’ve always pulled out of those situations pretty quickly, but some of them have taken major work to heal from. I’ve always felt more comfortable alone, but I still longed for a community, to be loved + fully embraced in my totality. A lot of those feelings dissipated in my twenties as I found new community on my travels + throughout my college years.
I’ve slowly been digging through every boundary I was taught. By my family. By my community. I’ve always been a wild one, but I’ve also always felt this pressure not to disappoint my family by being too different from others [my mom + brother are the ones that are most uncomfortable with “stepping outside the box” + are typically the ones that encourage me to do/be like the masses].
Slowly I’m giving less attention to the generational gaps + gender gaps + cultural gaps + societal gaps that were giving me anxiety. I think one of my greatest karmic lessons in this life is releasing my fear of judgment. And through the healing of my wounds + releasing of that fear, I will also help others heal + release their fear of being judged.
With much love + support from my tribe, I’m finding deeper layers of my authentic self, which feels like pure magic. Because I feel so beautifully safe, the armor of protection I’ve gotten so used to carrying has started to fall off + I feel myself softening. With new wisdom + guidance + roadmaps from my teachers, I feel like I am doing some deep, deep karmic work on my precious little SELF. So that I can build those bridges of love. Those bridges that actually connect us, not separate us.

6 Mar 2015

GAIA MAGIC {feelin’ it}

FEELIN’ IT // big time lately. and these loverboys are a huge part of that.
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4 Feb 2015

LESS BOUNDARIES {more security}

BOOK WORM // The holiday break was so nice. I overdosed on snuggles with my boys, got in extra time with family + friends, + I read/re-read quite a few books. One was No Boundary by Ken Wilber.
The simple fact is that we live in a world of conflict + opposites because we live in a world of boundaries. Here is the human predicament: the firmer one’s boundaries, the more entrenched are one’s battles. The more I hold onto pleasure, the more I fear pain. The more I pursue goodness, the more I am obsessed with evil. The more I seek success, the more I dread failure. The harder I cling to life, the more terrifying death becomes.
MAMA HUSSY no boundary ken wilber I’ve been re-reading this book since college. over a decade. It shifts my perspective a little more every time I read it. It’s been a while, so it felt great to dig in over the holidays. Since I re-read it this time, I’ve been pushing each boundary I come across. Not in a rebellious way. But in a “Is this really what makes ME + my family happy + healthy?” way. I’ve been taught a lot of limiting beliefs from my mom + the small town in which I grew up. Limiting beliefs founded in fear, masked in rationality + caution. While I appreciate some of them + might even keep some of them, I’ve realized how most of them keep me [+ my family] fearful + stagnant. I am trying to do life from a place of love, not fear. This doesn’t mean reckless. In fact, I think love is very wise. I feel much more clear-minded + more secure + more empowered when I am acting + thinking from a place of love instead of a place of fear.
*I want to share this powerful book with others, so I’m giving away a copy of No Boundary. Instructions: simply comment on this post with your email address. I’ll announce the winner on February 14! Happy Valentine’s Day + good luck!

3 Feb 2015

MOVING RIGHT ALONG {manifesting those big dreams}

imageMOVING RIGHT ALONG // in September, we decided to start house hunting in our hometown for schools + to create that smalltown, pedestrian lifestyle. per usual, I jumped the gun + transferred the boys to Norman schools before finding a house. I’ve enjoyed all of the extra time with our family + Norman tribe. but we still haven’t found that dream home + our commute is total beatdown. I tend to be slightly neurotic + rarely let a dream die, but I’m trying to listen to the whispers of a bigger picture. so we’ve decided to reassess things + are back in OKC fulltime while we see just how big we can dream! *this pic is out front of an awesome house we looked at by the talented architect Gemino, who studied under Frank Lloyd Wright.

29 Jan 2015

MYSTIC MOON CIRCLE {high vibrational sisterhood}

MOON SISTERHOOD // The truth is, we don’t have a road map for this experience of Woman. Ancient teachings and initiations have been hidden or silenced. And so we have blindly followed in the Masculine energies of going and pushing, all the while fumbling in the dark. We have been taught to use fear as a compass, competition as a weapon, and self-judgment or self-doubt as our default setting. -Achintya Devi
MAMA HUSSY sisters of the moonI have always had a major awareness to our tie to the moon’s cycles. So I was ecstatic when I found Goddess Rising, where I could delve in deeper with the moon’s rhythm + ride the power it has to offer us. As a part of my commitment to my holistic health, I decided to participate in the Sisters of the Moon with Goddess Rising [Achintya]; a mystic moon circle of sisters. Through ritual celebration, intuitive practices, and creative expression Achintya invites us to awaken and deepen our divine consciousness, feminine truth, strength and empowerment. Emotionally, physically, spiritually, mentally, sexually, psychically. In our Moon Temples we connect with the magic of both the full and new moon energies, align with celestial influences and reveal relevant astrology to assist us in each lunar cycle. We celebrate the sacred rhythm of birth, life, death and rebirth in nature, reflected as the living womb wisdom and emotional intelligence within us.
I’ve already gained a huge amount of clarity + have received some beautiful affirmations since the new year has started. It’s so nice to feel the support + love from this sisterhood while I try to manifest some of the biggest dreams I’ve ever dreamed.

28 Jan 2015

ACUPUNCTURE {holistic health}

Finding the ideal healthcare plan can take a long time + is ever-evolving as we age. I do not think there is a one-size-fits-all healthcare plan. After years of research + trying out so many things with an open mind + investing a lot of time + money, I have found a pretty solid system for myself at my age. I take the preventative medicine approach; I live a holistic lifestyle, trying to stay out of the [Western] doctors offices. This is a daily commitment for me; it takes a lot of honesty with myself [about my emotional + physical state] on the daily. It is a financial commitment because insurance doesn’t pay for most of these things. Currently, my perfect plan consists of a clean diet [mainly vegetarian + gluten free + dairy free] + hot yoga [love the heat!] + supplements + essential oils + acupuncture + chiropractic adjustments + exercise [outside as often as possible] + a whole lot of rest + love toward myself. Some of the services I receive feel like therapy sessions because the people I work with are so insightful + believe in a holistic approach to health. I also love supplementing with massages + colonics + cleanses + some coaching [with mah gurl, Rebecca] + reiki treatments [with Marilyn + Melissa at Be the Light] when I’m needing that extra support through a situation.
The treatment I experience the most powerful + holistic results with is acupuncture. Like with all of these things, I think it very much depends on the person working on/with you. A good relationship is imperative, with a clear understanding of the goal(s). Typical things acupuncture can help people with are back pain  + anxiety + digestion + allergies.
Like my naturopath, my acupuncturist believes that our health depends on both diet + mental/emotional health. Lisa + I have a great relationship, and we are able to read my body very well as a team + work together to move my chi. A few weeks ago she said my yin was low [duh! the  nighttime nursing is gettin’ me good], so she worked on balancing my yin + gave me a few suggestions to help bring up my yin. Lisa helps me with anything that I am working on or dealing with at the time, like my wrist cysts, my shoulder pain from holding Wolfey all day, my mama anxiety, cleansing my colon, a cold… My entire body benefits in ways I don’t even realize by simply making sure chi is moving freely without any blocks + raising my vibration. I’ve even noticed my face looking more youthful since I’ve been receiving regular acupuncture.